It has been years since I have been to Botantic garden. Its KH's first time there too. We tried the foot therapy, it was so painful. I guess I have a lot of health problems in my body... He held my hands and went through the painful path with me.
My face was tomato red. I was wondering it is the pain from my foot or the excitement that he held my hand. But I know it is definitely a good blood circulation. :)
It has been 6 years since someone has ever sincerely held my hands. Feels kinda funny at first haha... Maybe I'm so used to be alone after all these years. I always thought I will be ready for love but the feel of being in love seems to be so out of place in my life.
How long do I want to torture myself mentally? The fear of being losing someone eventually has come into my mind over and over again. My first negative thought was when will it last? I'm quite skeptical about any relationships. Yar, I know not all relationships will have a sad ending. Maybe it is just me. After so many years, I just couldn't get over the pain inside me. KH knew where is my worry and he is reassuring that it will not be the same.
I know every relationship will have different outcome. Who knows this may really work out in the end? I shouldn't have kill the possible that it may work out eventually. For at least, my heart did pump differently for once, when he held my hands...
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