I have written down the essence of this book. However, I still recommend this book to friends who enjoy reading and have a sense of humor :)
The Pink Elephant are words of denials such as 'don't', 'not', 'no', 'did not' and 'didn't' are transparent. We automatically look through them for the real meaning.
For example, if i say 'Don't think of pink elephant.' Immediately, your mind will appear a clear picture of a Pink Elephant!
So a pink elephant is unnecessary and normally vivid, negative. It is the metal baggage we always carry around with us.
Always tell people who we really are.
1. Begin with some self analysis. Are you using Pink Elephants?
2. Describe what is happening. Stick to the positive point.
3. Hunt down the Pink Elephants in your conversations and those of others.
Chapter 2 - Every Picture Tells a Story
1. Speak in vivid pictures to paint clear descriptions.
2. Use analogies to turn abstract concepts and jargon into bright pictures.
3. Avoid talking above or below your audience's level. Instead, talk to their level.
Chapter 3 - Staying on Louisiana Highway
1. Retain the moral high ground by remaining patient and polite.
2. Be sure of your facts and use only polite explanation.
3. That's how to stay on Louisiana Highway, rather than getting stuck in the swamp.
Chapter 4 - Sorry seems to be the hardest word
1. Saying 'Sorry' is the best way to start rebuilding confidence in your relationship after something has gone wrong.
2. We respect those who apologise - and lost respect for those who pretend to be infallible.
3. Regret, Reason and Remedy offers an apology, explanation and solution. It manages expectation, which must then be met.
Chapter 5 - Tell the Unpalatable Truth, rather than the 'White Lie'
When you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything. - Mark Twain
1. The truth can be defined by how far you are willing to go to establish a fact.
2. The truth is reality, white lie is a figment of the imagination.
3. Once a lie is discovered, you are a liar.
Chapter 6 - Thank You and Well Done Well done is better than well said. - Benjamin Franklin
1. Saying 'Thank You and Well Done' demonstrates your appreciation. It raises your self-confidence and that of the person you are thanking.
2. It builds loyalty, while lack of recognition builds indifference.
3. When someone thanks you, accept his or her gratitude with good grace. Put it in the bank and watch your confidence grow.
Chapter 7 - Who looks stupid when you criticise in public?
1. Destructive criticism of children and adults alike destroys their self-confidence and often turns them into critics themselves.
2. Only offer criticism privately and ensure you are able to explain how things can be done better.
3. Humour is great. Just make sure everybody finds your humour funny. Haha :D
Chapter 8 - Flush out the watering down words
1. Remove words that dilute your message. Words like 'quite', 'relatively', 'hopefully', 'fairly' and 'reasonably'
2. 'I'll do my best' and 'I'll try' both lack firm commitment. 3. To avoid sounding evasive, where possible begin an answer with 'yes', 'no' or 'I don't know.'
Chapter 9 - Talk positively about yourself
1. Start describing your life positively and watch the interest grow.
2. Be positive in the face of bad news. By breaking the news, you remain in control of what's being said first.
3. Instead of assuming, check the facts.
Chapter 10 - It's all relative
1. For anything to be interesting, we need to relate to it.
2. What's interesting to us may well be boring to our audience.
3. Put a problem into perspective to see how small it really is.
Chapter 11 - Email and text - Bullets or Boomerangs?
1. Emails travel at the speed of bullets, so be certain of what you're saying before pulling the trigger.
2. Conversational English makes a speech or presentation much easier to follow.
3. We all have accents. Stop being self-conscious about yours.
Chapter 12 - Three little questions
1. What do I want to say? Always have a few points ready.
2. Who am I speaking to? Consider your audience and their interests.
3. How should I put it? Once you consider that, you can arrange your bullet points in order of importance.
Chapter 13 - Listen first to Understand
1. Listen carefully to the person you are talking with.
2. Contribute to the conversation in a meaningful way, rather than just waiting to butt in.
3. Use body language and the tone of your voice to add conviction to your well-chosen words.
Chapter 14 - Powerful words
1. Powerful words can sum up a situation better than loose thoughts.
2. They can inspire you to succeed and to act in the knowledge that others have gone there before you.
3. Words have to be consistent with your actions - Otherwise they are empty words.
Chapter 15 - Think, Talk, Act... Then Tell the World
1. Put all the highway code rules of good communication into action each day.
2. Allow your confidence to grow from the certainty they bring your words, your thoughts and your actions.
3. Tell the world what you have to offer. It can mean the difference between success and failure, happiness and frustrations. Even life and death.
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