Day 263: GAB 3 Money Self Reflection

My father family was considered quite well to do and my mother comes from poor family. However, my immediate family considered a middle-income family, Money is currently enough for the family. We don’t have to worry much about money. My parent’s house is already paid for. We own 2 cars. We have a helper to help us. We are living comfortably.

Childhood background
My Dad earned the money during my childhood he was in charge of the money flow as he paid the bills, balanced the check book. As my mother is a homemaker, he will give my mother household allowance monthly. My Dad is the sole breadwinner. He always says, “Money is hard to earn. Don’t anyhow spend.”

True enough, I really adopt his way of thinking and I struggled with my money and I find it so hard to grow my wealth. I am not poor but I am neither rich too. I get the freedom that I always wanted. Plan my schedule and the tasks that I want to do. I allow my things to flow through.

My mother was the one who distributed the household allowance, gave the allowance of $10 to me every week. She always says, “Things are expensive. Better don’t anyhow spend.” That gives me a mindset not to spend extravagantly. I believe money was hard to come by. Even I had money. that is useful for me, I will think very hard before I buy that item. Eg. Upgrading my PC, buying stationeries etc. I was wondering why my peers can make money so easily and swiftly. I was bluffed. Then I realised they don't have the money issue like me, they had other issues.

My relationship with Money
Money gave me lots of pain in the past. I don’t remember the first time I earned money. If I remember correctly, I just use the money to settle my living expenses only. Due to strong negative feelings about money. This is probably one of the reasons, why I was scammed by a stranger over money.

Has a financial windfall or major loss changed your life? How did it impact your life?
My first lie about my financial situation at age of 9. I was being blackmailed by a classmate. I had to lie to my mum that I lost my money for the bus fee, $80. During that time, $80 is a huge sum of money for a 9-year-old child. Just to pay my classmate and I didn’t have enough courage to report to my school teacher and in the end the classmate got suspended from the school she does other illegal things to other classmates.

Another poor relationship with money and trust, I was scammed by someone from the internet. It was the worst mistake that I had made about money decision. I had lost $22k, just like that. It was a very painful lesson. I choose to believe stranger words than my own family. My dad and my sister had to help me to pay. I paid my sister monthly.

When I reflected, I didn’t trust my own family. The trust was broken long time ago. I realised that I need to rebuild my family trust again. Money doesn't drop from sky. Efforts are required. I shouldn’t use my money so carelessly.

Things have changed after that, we put love before money now. We didn’t quarrel over money anymore as we handle our own money nowadays. My sister begins to trust me again as she sees me how I manage my own money. I will discuss with my family if I face some money issues. We treasure our relationships in the family.

Wealth Management
I learnt to manage my own wealth.
Pay myself first 10% every time money comes in.
I build my money system. I have a budget. I plan carefully where my money goes to.
If it is something I really need to invest / spent, I know when the money is going to come in and how I use my money. I manage money so much better. I am happy to put money at the right place now. Putting money into good use.

I put them in money baskets like
- Investment
- Savings
- Monthly Expenses
- Food
- Transport
- Fun
- Courses / personal development
- Business
- Donations
- Backup
- Travel (Optional)